I am a poster girl with no poster.

tesfest

Quick rundown of the awesome…

Friday- Got to watch the beginnings of a REALLY FUCKING HOT scene in which Jim polished ClaireAdams’s boots, while next to them her partner DamienPierce tied up and beat on MissCalico. om nom nom. Something about those 4 together was scintillating.

Then I went over and tried to put my hand in the lovely Becci, which dind’t happen, but the attempt was fun. I gave her lots of orgasms. Then Aiden stuck his hand in me and gave me warm tinglies when he commented that he liked the whimpers I made and the flush i got.Then I got to beat up and flog Becci’s bum for a bit. That was fun. She’s cute when she runs away.

Saturday- Had a scene with Parker that involved a rope partial, an ass hook, the slight realization I could be into leather as I ran my hand down the back of his leather vest, some kissing and some punching. Then the winch set free and while it was momentarily exciting trying to land and maintain balance, it was a bummer that it ended the scene so awkwardly. Afterward we parted ways really oddly and it made me sad.

Then out in the courtyard I helped rig up MsSamber for a suspension/fisting. It was weird because i was in a fucked up headspace which made me frustrated easily, but finally she was up in a position that was comfortable enough to support the rest of the activities that was intended. I probably shouldn’t have been playing with rope like that but i was only assisting, not taking charge. Between that and getting to beat the everliving pulp out of Tiff’s ass I got over my funk. Tiff has such a cute butt and apparently she appreciates that I have a heavy hand. I blame being a hand drummer; I’m used to slapping metal, plastic, and skin.

Sunday- While in the dynamic suspension class with Cherries Jubalie and Monekyfetish as the demo-dom. Someone asked about doing a dynamic suspension with someone who isn’t quite as in shape as Cherries, and so I managed to get myself volunteered. A gunslinger, and some ankle points later, I’m up playing around in a suspension. It was so much fun. I haven’t been suspended since before my injury. It was fantastic even if it was just a show and tell class kind of thing.

Then that evening I worked my volunteer hours at Cloud 9. I felt surprisingly comfortable giving massages. It fits well into my desire to please and bring pleasure to others. Just laying my hands on their skin and feeling them and feeling what could make them release and relax… I wish I could figure out minds as well as I can figure out bodies. I think I want to learn more about giving good massages.

hung out near the wrestling mats for just a second too long after cloud 9 and I managed to take a wildly swinging heel to the shin, which turned into a GIANT painful welt in minutes. It SUCKED. I do not like unsexy-bruises. After that I met up with Doug and we played a bit in the cloud 9 room. It was mostly just sensation. A knife, his hands, a flogger and a Hitachi. The Hitachi never made it to my genitals. It did make it to my jaw, my temple, my sternum, and pressed against a hand that had a finger up my nose. I have to say it was easily one of the strangest scenes ever but it felt really comfortable. He also cut my shirt off. NOM.

Later on that night, at about 4 in the morning, I wound up lamenting my lack of sexy bruises a little too close to the hearing of a sadist. So I was whipped a little then punched and taken down. It was excelent. The grass was fucking itchy though. He managed not to leave and visible bruises aside form the marks where he wrapped the whip around my throat, which I thought was hot, but makes it tough to be around my mom. Turtlenecks are not an option in 100 degree weather. The rest of my body felt bruised as shit but there wasn’t any discoloration form his punches.  While I like bruises it definitely made going home easier.

Yanno, I thought I didn’t do much at TESFest but after typing this and thinking of whether or not to add all the little things I did as well, I realized, Holy fuck, i did a lot. It dind’t feel like it because there was empty spots and dirty longings, but in the end I got to touch a LOT of people. Yay!

mind the gap.

My mind is my biggest erogenous zone. I know that’s pretty common and that lots of erotic intellectuals say that but I can’t stress how true it is.

I was at a party once. I got an OTK spanking. The guy was smacking my ass, rubbing my butt cheeks, fingering me, and other things. I was kinda MEH about the whole thing. I mean it was more entertaining then sitting around looking for someone else to play with, but it wasn’t really what I wanted to do. He wasn’t the kind of person that tickled the dirty parts of my brain.

Also at the party, my friend told me a story of how he’s mindfucking this girl who hates electro play. he describes the scene and the set up in a low tone with his face close to my neck, and his voice low. Now this guy overall isn’t someone I’m visually attracted to, but in that moment, telling that story. I was squirming. I could feel parts of my body buzzing… He dind’t even touch me but all it took was some words, some proximity, that electricity of actually not touching at all… It was hot to me. He wasn’t even talking about doing things to me either, but the twistedness and proximity and such just did it.

It’s the mind that gets me.

I could have danced all night

I have a mentor fetish. I touched on it a little in my littles post, but I was entertained by the thought about the movie “My Fair Lady”. It was one of my favorite movies as a kid. It was about a girl who sought to be in a way subservient to a guy in return for education to the point where she actually surpassed him.She also did come to love him.

A friend pointed out that Henry Higgins was a bsdm dom role model for him. This made me think about the fact that I needed Pickering too. Higgins was too whiny. Do this get me that, I stubbed my toe WAHHH, It’s one thing to be demanding it’s another to be a baby. But Pickering was the one who stopped and took a second to care for the mentee as well. I’d need both of those characters (Ideally as one, because I don’t think I’d be able to respect Higgens alone or feel the power shift with just Pickering)

The thing that started this all was the fact that my room is clean-ish and my bed was made* and I thought in my head, I made my bed, sir, can we fuck now? I’m a GOOD girl, I am!”

If I ever start talking in a bad cockney accent, you’re welcome to slap my face and tell me “In Hartford, Herrisford and Hampshire, Hurricanes Hardly ever Happen!” to which I’d counter, “Git yer ownn schooz!” to which you can say “The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plains!” and that would be hotter then any OTK I think I could receive. (I’ve got an OTK story! That’ll be for another time!)

*having a clean and presentable room is a turn on for me, makes me feel all adult like, and makes me want to have company over to be in my bed.

Makin’ you hot.

One of my favorite lays was this guy mike. I met him online and went to his place at like 5 in the morning. That could have been really stupid but he turned out to be some average kid about 2 years older then me really nice, quite cute, about my height, about half of my weight, nice arms, played guitar, had a decent job, there was really nothing wrong with him except his apartment was kinda drab, but hey it was a bachelor pad. he kept night hours because he did overnight shifts.

So I get over to his place and after some small talk he asks if he can kiss me, I say Oh sure. so we start making out and he starts touching me, and he’s like, “is this ok”and I say yeah, this i good. That sorta gives him the ok , and we really start getting into it. and then he starts getting a bit animalistic on me. It was really hot.

I don’t think I’ve ever been with anyone who was just that crazy about my body. Guys have been ok with my body, and have been willing to overlook the majority of it because I’m a cool person or I give good head or they just wanted something soft wet and squishy.  There’s been a few guys who’ve tried to LOVE my body to the point of fetishization, grabbing my stomach, rubbing it, licking it, and almost being more into my fa then ME. that was not ok. This guy though was simply just into my body. everything about it, nothing more then the rest, he wanted to touch, lick grab look at, squeeze every inch of me. it was really awesome.

And we fucked, and then when we were done, it was like 10 seconds of laying together and him touching me and he was ready to go again, I apparently made him that hot. He wasn’t the greatest lay, I don’t know if i just made him too excited, but it was very highschool rushed and very standard porn vanilla. omgkissing omgboobies omggirlnaked omghead omglickingpussy omgfuckingin outinoutinout-done, peel off condom, flop down. but just his sheer gusto for ME, made it hot and super fun, he just could not avoid getting hard at the sight of me. We had his highschool style of sex about 5 times in the span of about 2 hours.

It’s been a while since I’ve felt that comfortable. Unfortunately, that was only fleeting, but I just wish I had a little more time like that. I started getting a more daytime schedule and we wound up losing contact.

I like to please people, and I always have this nagging fear or worry that if I’m not directly doing something to my partner I’m not being pleasing overall. It was nice to know that for once being able to lay back and relax was truly undoubtedly pleasing to my partner.

take your pleasure from me.

I was at a small-ish party and I went down on a woman. Considering how into female bodied people I am, this shouldn’t be a big deal… but oddly I get creepy-old-dude feeling whenever I go near a female I dig. I’ve dealt with the creepy old dude trying to get into my pants before. I don’t want to be just another creepy person to these people, so I’ve kinda skirted women a bit even though I like them. Because of this, I actually haven’t gone down on a woman since before i got my tongue split. I split my tongue 4 and a half years ago, yes that’s how long it’s been.
When people hear about my tongue often their minds will wander dirty and I’ll get comments/questions “Ohh I bet guys love that” and often because I have very open-minded friends I’ll hear “I bet girls love that”. I’ve been able to report that guys do seem to enjoy it, then again that means a mouth is on their penis, so most likely they are enjoying whatever I do at that point, but I’ve not tried it on a woman. I have had a guy with a forked tongue make out with me and go down on me, but I’m not so hot on people going down on me, so it made no difference. Finally, I can answer that.
She is quite smart and instead of just saying “ohh that’s interesting” and leaving it at that, she was able to explain to me how my tongue does this and that, but a solid tongue could achieve the same result if it did this, or that. In the end I’m not smart enough to remember all she said so I’ll boil it down to “interesting”. I did personally enjoy how I could lick and her clit would slide between my tongue, and how I was able to squeeze it and twist it a little. It may not have felt outrageously different to her, but it definitely intrigued me.
Let’s also not forget that I love servicing people. I’m not hot on body fluids, but licking, sucking, touching, petting, teasing, even most of my topping is all pretty much service based. To please someone I like is very enjoyable to me. To get to please someone I like who is beautiful and smart, and she spoke to me, and touched me, and told me what she wanted so I could please her, and god she came so elegantly.
Maybe it was worth the wait for that experience….

but now I’d like to not go so long between.

the sex addict pt2

I saw the sex addict again. He instructed me to bring my rope, wear dark makeup around my eyes, and to wear a lot of perfume. Something about instructions like that are kinda hot. I commented, “what? you want me to smell like a french whore?” Some part of wishes I could role play that up a bit. He speaks french. It would have been hot if he had called me dirty names in french.

I made sure to prep… I bought an enema bottle (it’s quite the cute blue bulb thing…) showered, and cleaned everything. Then I slathered myself in my honeysuckle body lotion and got myself off once or twice. I did my make up, tossed on my linen black sundress and headed on over.

When i got there, I added a few last sprays of my honeysuckle perfume, grabbed my rope bag and headed on in. He greeted me at the door with no shirt, low slung acid wash ripped jeans and bare feet. His californian really shone through with the bit of hip bone pelvic area showing and the flipped over hair and the laid back style in his really well designed dark stain furniture apartment. I’m a visceral person, these tiny things excited me. Yes, good interior design makes me have dirty thoughts as well as a well executed style.

We entered and I put my stuff to the side and sat on the couch with him and the Matrix was on. He asked me if I brought my rope and I said yes, got out a few hanks and laid them out on the coffee table.

we started making out, he told me to get undressed. He pushed the coffee table back and made me get on my knees. He pulled his cock out and pushed my mouth down on it. He pulled my head up and wiped his hand across my face and eyes trying to smear my makeup. When that didn’t work, he grabbed a chunk of rope and told me to unwind it. I did and he took it and wrapped it around my hands. He doesn’t have the mastery but he makes up for it in many, many, many tight loops. Once my hands were tied he brought me into his spare room.

He connected my hands to the base of the iron coffee table and straddled my face and shoved his cock down my throat. I struggled to turn my head in the right way so that he wouldn’t hit my teeth as he face fucked me. He groped my body and smacked parts of me.

He pulled a condom on and fucked me shallowly, just enough to drive me wild. He left the head in and I squeezed and pushed massaging the head of his cock. He licked his fingers and attempted to use the saliva to smear my makeup around my face. After a bit of that teasing he pulled out, yanked off the condom and pushed himself back into my mouth.

He took another hank of my rope and wrapped it around my head/mouth so I couldn’t make too much noise he started shoving his hand into my pussy. He was fairly persistent and didn’t bother working it in so much as just pushing and pausing. There was no extra lubricant or stimulation. I was proud that I was capable of pushing out and relaxing enough to accept his hand. It did hurt though, but not as much as the first time.

He fist fucked me for a bit then. He enjoys hurting me from the inside and pulling out and pushing back in quickly. He didn’t do this for too long because every time he got too aggressive on my cervix I’d squeeze my legs shut. So he pulled out and went off to wash his hands with just a “stay there”.

used.

When he came back his hands were wet and he flicked the cold water over my body, then tried wiping,smearing my eye makeup more with the water. He pulled the rope gag down from my mouth to my neck and let my arms go from the table. My wrists were still tied together. He sat back against the wall and had me roll over  onto my hands and knees and suck him. He wrapped his hands into my hair, and grabbed a hold of the coil of rope around my neck and used that to steer my face into his groin. He grabbed his belt at his side and used it to smack my back and ass.

He pulled my face up with the coil around my neck, then realized that there was an end dangling from it. He grabbed the end and wrapped it around his hand and tugged a little, realizing he effectively had a leash. He got up and pulled me after him a little bit, then pulled me down the hallway and into his bedroom. It was difficult because my hands were tied together, so it was knee knee, hands, knee knee hands… I tried to hobble/crawl as fast and as gracefully as possible.

He pushed me over onto my back on the floor and grabbed some water. I warned him that hemp bloats on water, so he made sure the coils around my neck were loose before wiping water all over my face and then dumping it on my head. He was trying to smear my makeup again and decided I looked hot wet and bedraggled.

He grabbed the rope around my neck again and made me sit up on my knees and he sat on the edge of the bed and told me to suck it. I like the variation between being forced to do it, and being told to, so that I can comply. I can be the used toy AND the dirty whore. i got him right to the edge and he pulled me off him, and came on my chest.

he gave me baby wipes to clean up and I wiped myself off. Then he untied my wrists and I put away all my rope. We chatted for a bit, he’s much more talkative after he’s had an orgasm.

I left and headed home… He never did get my makeup to smear.

Quote the Air Force Boy…

“Soon as my roommate deploys in may, yer gonna come here and I’m gonna fuck the shit out of you. No questions, period”

the sex addict.

I’m still amazed at how fast he got his hand inside me. From start to inside me it took about a minute. It hurt. He didn’t use lube. He just started shoving fingers in me.

The entire night was pretty fast.

We had been talking very briefly on AdultFriendFinder (I’ll explain why I use this site in another post) and through there we finally set up a meeting for tonight. I insisted on meeting in public, so we met at Starbucks. We chatted at Starbucks for a bit until I felt comfortable enough to go back to his place without worrying about dying.

So we’re sitting on the couch talking and he’s quick, already has his hand on my leg. I truly appreciate this. I hate when there’s that awkward moment while they are trying to get up the nerve to touch you. It just felt natural that his hands was sliding up my thigh. Right off the bat as he started kissing me he started controlling me. The hands went to my head, one twined into my hair and the other at my throat as he bit my lip. He got me undressed fairly fast, leaving just my panties on as we made out and he groped me on the couch.

Then he used a hand in my hair to pull me into the spare room and have me kneel. Some more making out commenced while he undid his jeans. Then he told me to suck his cock, using my hair to guide my head down. I pulled his cock out of his underwear and sucked with gusto. This continued for a while in several positions, from him straddling my face to me lying in front of him on my tummy while he fucked my mouth.

At one point he left to grab some ties from the other room. He came back and tied my wrists together and to the foot of the iron coffee table. I started chuckling a little bit thinking about how badly he tied my wrists. He asked me what I was laughing at and I didn’t want to break the mood so I said “nothing”. So he slapped my face a few times and demanded I tell him what I was laughing back, so I shot back, “Your ties suck, I can get out of these easy!”. With that he smacked my face and then started facefucking me again. While he was doing that I worked on the ties and in a matter of about a minute i had my hands free and I slapped his thigh lightly to point it out to him.

He laid his knees on my shoulder and sat on my face and made me lick his balls then lick his ass. I’ve never licked an ass before. It’s not something I’ve ever wanted to do, but at that moment I just wanted to please, and so i stuck my tongue out and prayed that he washed really well.

This is when he pulled my underwear off and proceeded to stick a finger inside me, then a few seconds later, another finger, up until he had 4 fingers fucking me. As soon as he could slide them in and out without feeling the skin drag against his hand, he added his thumb and kept fucking me until he managed to slam his hand all the way inside me. This entire process had to have taken less then a minute… maybe somewhere around 30 seconds. I was stunned first at the pain, since there was no lube other then what my pussy had made, and secondly because of how fast and how brutal it was.

Once his hand was in he just kept fucking me with it. He liked it best when I was in pain so he would pull up with his hand nearly lifting me by my pelvic bone, and he really like slamming his fist into me hard and essentially punching my insides. When I started to get too loud, he grabbed my panties and shoved them into my mouth. When the punching got to be too intense I’d squeeze my legs together to stop him, but then he eventually leaned on my one leg and pushed my other leg away. He even got tot he point where he could keep his hand in a fist and with draw it and slam it back into me. This made me so wet you could hear the sloshing sound. finally after a particularly hard bit of thrusting he said “I can keep going or yo can suck my cock, which would you want?” and I just whimpered in response. So he yanked his hand up towards his chest pulling my bottom up towards him by my pelvic bone and said “Which one?” so I said “let me suck your cock”

He told me he wanted to fuck my ass and he asked me if it was clean, and I told him i didn’t get a chance to clean it. So he got annoyed and fucked my mouth and said, well fine then I’m going to cum in your mouth.

I call him the sex addict because he’s had sex with over 300 girls. The little fluffer to my ego is that he said I was one of the best blowjobs he’s ever received.

Afterward we sat around and talked about fantasies and how herpes sucks because he really would have liked to fuck me, and he touched me and petted me…

It was a fun night.

Things I shouldn’t get off on…

Here’s my first installment of things I shouldn’t get off on. This is where I feature thoughts that are fucked up, unsafe, or depraved yet oddly have aroused me. The topic of the day is

Ass to pussy.

Yeah I said it… I bet everyone with a vagina just cringed at the thought of all that bacteria romping around their delicate snatches and causing all sorts of infections. I KNOW that this activity is not good. When you google search “ass to pussy” you get a lot of warnings, when warnings come up well before porn you know an act is “bad”.

I LOVE seeing it in porn. I hate that the porn stars have to endure possibly getting an infection, but I guess in my mind I make it OK by thinking about the fact that they probably all enema to high hell before they perform.

the reason It gets me is the idea of being used as sort of hole. It’s definitely an element of objectification and humiliation. The fact that the partner enters whatever they want and then pulls out and enters the other opening, and then switches, just watching the body not have any boundries… then getting away from the psychological aspect, I LOVE anal play but I always get this little “aww poor vagina, being left out” feeling, so this would involve both openings. It’s also hot when someone can fully pull out of their partner, and not have to line up exactly to push back in, but rather pull the two bodies together and find one opening or another ready and willing to take the partner’s protrusion…

I’ve never tried this. I don’t know or think I will ever intentionally try this. But i can’t help finding it hot.

Old…

day 3

This was a picture i took about 3 days after getting my rear beaten by my friend MasterVirage. i only have very slight cresents of bruises on the top now.